Tomorrow I will celebrate my seventh wedding anniversary. When Alan and I started dating I had given up on finding love or even finding a decent date. I had a great group of girl friends (my brother referred to them as my cadre of angry female friends) which provided a rich social life, a good job, a wonderful son and a good life. I wasn’t especially lonely so I decided that I would march forward as a single woman and be content. Then along came Alan.

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Don Imus continues to make headlines today. Nearly two weeks after the latest in a long list of racist and sexist comments left his lips CBS developed a moral consciousness and fired Imus from his radio show. It took MSNBC-TV more than a week to reach that fateful decision which most people believe was motivated not by moral outrage but by the flight of deep pocketed advertisers like GM and Staples.

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Words hurt. Don Imus was reminded of that this week when his radio show was dropped by MSNBC-TV. He forgot that racist, sexist, homophobic, hate filled inflammatory speech hurts people because he has tolerated that kind of dialog for such a long time he had become hardened and tone deaf to it. I think many white men are ignorant of the effects of racist and sexist speech. They honestly don’t understand how harmful those remarks are to women and minorities. I do. Having labored in the ghetto of radio broadcasting most of my adult life and having worked under the boot of white men and been surrounded by their sexism, racism and homophobia, I know exactly how much their words hurt. I know precisely how difficult it is to find a decent job in broadcasting if you are a woman or any color but white and if you are deemed “difficult” or God forbid “uppity” or “aggressive” your life can really be hellish.

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