Call it fate or Karma or God's will but at different points in my life I've found myself presented with jobs or opportunities that have changed my life forever. My present job is proving to be one of those life-changing experiences.

I'm about a month into my new position as an HIV/AIDS Prevention Specialist for the Phoenix Center, a behavioral health center in Greenville, South Carolina. The Phoenix Center provides an array of alcohol and drug addiction and abuse and recovery programs, in-house detoxification, alcohol/drug treatment for addicted mothers and their children, parenting classes and free testing for AIDS. As part of my training and orientation I've been observing the alcohol and drug, safety action program (ADSAP) these are the classes you must complete at a mandatory cost of $500 if you have been arrested for driving under the influence (DUI), lost your license and want to regain your driver's license in the state of South Carolina. This twice-weekly two-hour class has proven to be an eye-opening personal review of my own behavior and sometimes stupid, high-risk choices that put my own life and the lives of others at risk. Every day since I started this job, at least once I've thought, "There by the grace of God, go I."

We've spent quite a bit of class time pondering the cost of driving drunk in terms of lives lost, personal injuries, cost to yourself, your insurance, lost time at work, the humiliation of being arrested and spending the night in jail, the embarrassment of having an arrest record. The list goes on&I'm certainly not proud of the fact that it's an outright miracle that I've never had a DUI and I'm certainly not in a position to judge anyone else. I guess God thought it was time for Roxanne to take personal inventory and believe me & it's been painful. I realize that I've teetered on the brink of the abyss of alcoholism at several points in my life. I've relied on alcohol to relieve stress, boredom, and sadness and to celebrate all the good things in my life. Alcohol has been my friend and my enemy, a lady in my class today said, "First the man takes the drink and in the end the drink takes the man." If you're very fortunate and alcoholism doesn't run in your family you can dodge the bullet and start drinking and be strong enough to know your limits and walk away or you can let it rule your life and ruin your health and destroy your marriage and wreck your career and eventually kill you.

What I've come to realize is that sometimes the worst thing is often the best thing. Getting arrested for DUI can sometimes save your life. Coming to these ADSAP classes might seem like a stupid waste of time and then mid-way through something hits you that makes sense and you realize you aren't a lost cause that maybe this does make a little sense and you can make some changes and improve your life. I like hearing people's stories and knowing that there's hope and that people can change and find happiness.

I'm glad I'm here and even though it's been painful I'm glad I'm alive to take inventory and look back because now that I know better, I fully intend to do better.